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I try to be a positive person, at least when it comes to the external world. I said 'try'. Frankly, the way things are going, I'm not in any way looking forward to the future. Oh, nice, I get to watch my country slowly descend into socialism. I get to watch our population triple within my lifetime. I get to witness the Bill of Rights systematically discredited piece by piece. I get to see thought police become an absolute reality. I get to experience the wrath of anti-American murderers bent on destroying huge numbers of civilians.

Please, someone, email me and tell me all the good things the future holds.

On a more local level... I do not really enjoy the people in the town I live in. It seems as if quality people, those who have a shred of decency and character and intelligence, are one in a hundred. Maybe one in a thousand.

I did not appreciate being called a racist because I said I had no desire to learn Spanish and further assured that I'd be learning it sooner or later or finding myself unable to survive in society because 'the Latinos are taking over'.

I did not enjoy driving around a stunningly crowded Fort Worth over Spring Break. Have you looked around? Do you see how many of "us" there are? And how packed in like rodents in a cage we are?

Has a teenager read a book in the past five years? Why is date raping/promiscuity the number one driving force/hobby for so many young males (and females)? Why are people nothing without the other people around them? Why are so many 'non-conformists' so predictable?

I'm just wondering.

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Playboy is doing a 'women of Enron' issue.

There have been five major suicide bombings in Israel since the BIG ONE a week ago. War is GOING to happen. We can either let it happen and play itself out or we can get involved militarily. Israel has 4000 state of the art tanks, 11,000 armored troop carriers, 104,000 professional soldiers and active infantry, and 450,000 reservists. Gas prices are going to jump and jump and jump as various OPEC nations attempt to use leverage against the US. They want the US to force Israel to hand over a bunch of land to the Palestinians, as a reward for their slaughter of innocent people. Palestinians think their 15 year old suicide bombers are martyrs. The war just has to happen. Look for gas prices at the pump to hit $3/gallon or more this summer. I'm sure someone from Europe would like to chime in right now about how they already pay that much.

My insurance quote for a ZX-12R is currently $8422 per year.

Maryland won the NCAA tournament. Fucking moron fans then went out and trashed the town. The WINNING TEAM. They started fires, destroyed police cars, attacked people, looted, etc. Hundreds of thousands of dollars in damage. Their team won. One girl, interviewed, said "it's tradition, we have the craziest fans ever". Die, you skanky alcoholic lowlife.

There is a runoff for UNT student council chairman. Usually I'd care less about that than I would about a dead insect on the road. However, each candidate had a short paragraph in Friday's paper. I was startled by the idiocy. Where am I? Who are these people?

There was a student vote on the proposed fleecing of students for the new (and amazingly unnecessary) stadium. Surprisingly, or not so, depending upon how pessimistic you are, the students voted **NO**. Doesn't matter, apparently. The 'board of regents' or some such overbearing bureaucratic team voted yes. I just developed what will be a lifelong grudge against UNT athletics.

I have realized I don't want to live in this town. At all. There is very little to recommend it.

I also do not want to live in a larger city. All I could think of was a colony of ants which had been allowed to flourish unnaturally and drastically exceed the carrying capacity of its habitat.

Wal-Mart has become the largest company in the world. It makes over one billion dollars every day.

I got my wedding invitation. The wedding is one day. It will cost $40,000+. It is one day. And it will cost over forty-thousand dollars.

This is allergy week. I'm waiting. It won't be long now. The first of many.

My environmental science lab instructor (not to be confused with my environmental science lecture professor) finally went off the deep end last week. A tirade. Against people who use cars. Against people who eat meat, or a whole list of things. Against basically the entire economic system of the Western world. Against people who are in college because they might like to get a job to make money some day. Against people who have children. I can't even think of what else. It was two hours of biting my lip, literally, biting my lip. He showed us the home he's building in New Mexico. It's made of mud. It has no electricity. He insisted this is all anyone needs to live, and furthermore anyone who wants more than that is a greedy bastard who's using more than his fair share, even though he's living in an apartment near campus right now. But no one escaped his indictments. I pity him. He obviously carries guilt the size of Jupiter on his back. I think he looks back at every single piece of paper he's used, every kilowatt/hour of electricty he's consumed, every glacier he's helped melt, probably even every lungful of carbon dioxide he's breathed out... and cringes at the destruction he's wrought.

Of course turning on a light or going to the store in a car is destroying the planet. It's common sense. Common sense would have it the stars are real small dots of twinkling light, and NO WAY you'll get that kite with a boat engine to fly.

Rachel is still in the hospital. STILL in ICU, in fact. She had some type of surgery. She nearly died. She's 24.

President Bush signed the campaign finance reform bill, saying, brilliantly, "I think it's the right thing to do". Way to use the bully pulpit, very slick. Dick Gephardt is happy. Free Speech has been chilled. Between that and his suborning illegal immigration and his deal with the devil (education bill with Ted Kennedy) and his proposed vast expansion of the Drug War, he's really batting a thousand lately. Mr. President, please just stick with protecting the people from religious fanatics, stop expanding the reach of government with every move you make. What's next, government taking over the entire healthcare industry and shaping it after the model of efficiency and acumen that the INS is?

Nothing beats a syringe full of adrenaline. Feels as if someone just poured a mix of ground glass, acid, and burning tequila into your veins.

A group of black people is seeking reparations (through the courts) from several companies which supposedly supported slavery. Of course, they've used Present Value. And adjusted for inflation. They want up to ONE TRILLION DOLLARS total. For something somebody five or more generations ago did. Free handouts for black people because hundreds of years ago some other people were slaves. If I were black I'd be fucking irate and insulted.

Somebody bashed in the rear windshields of Rachel's car and my brother's car and two other cars down the block a couple nights ago.

Ships will now be referred to as 'it' rather than 'she'. Calling a ship 'she' is now something only an insensitive misogynist does.

The Sims has made over $400,000,000.

A guy got a ticket on his CBR the other day because only one headlight was on (the bike is designed that way, btw) and another because his helmet visor wasn't fully in the down position, despite the fact he had on full gear and sunglasses and was going 30 mph.

The last time I vomitted was in June of 1994. I had Salmonella poisoning and didn't eat for many days. I vomitted lots of bile. I hallucinated spreadsheets. Column upon column of demon numerals slowly inching across my vision for about thirty-six hours.

Oh, Entitlement. The fallacy that anecdotal experience is valid just because it's your own, or that your opinion is worth something just because you have one.